Just say “no”

This past week the US Surgeon General floated the idea of putting a warning label on social media platforms, citing the dangers for teenagers. One person quipped: the best way to get a teenager to do something is to tell them to not do it. Whether or not such a warning would work is a topic for another day.

When I was coming of age in a rural, Oklahoma town, the perils of primary concern were sex and drugs (we’d already come to terms with rock and roll). The internet was just coming online, and the only socializing I did via the www was in the MxPx chatroom. It was not habit-forming.

This June I decided to just say “no” to social media (Why June? Why not?)

Two-thirds into my pilgrimage, here are some of my observations:

The honey-moon period.

I was immediately amazed by my newfound extra time and energy. This stage is euphoric, but short-lived.

The crash.

I quickly discovered the depth of my addiction, which is partly an addiction to social media but also an addiction to the phone itself and not quite knowing how to do life (or poop) without it. I found myself reading more Wikipeda and looking at the Map app a lot. I scan the globe and zoom into random towns in Russia and Texas. Sidenote: I’m not sure who is parking the buses in Weatherford, Texas, but they really pack them in.

An image found while scouring the earth’s surface during my social media withdrawal period.

The difficulty.

I also found that, beyond mere appeasement of my own vanity, social media is deeply linked to our work-life and our various roles. If you’re anything like me, you manage multiple accounts that need attention beyond your personal account. Quickly after making my vow of social self-denial, I had to re-download Instagram for work. I tried to make it a get in and get out mission.

Coming to peace.

Twenty days in to my commitment, I’ve sort of leveled off. I initially had a strange sort of FoMO, but that’s subsided, and I’ve been able to focus more on the people around me. Something that’s helped significantly has been keeping myself busy. The past few weeks have been filled with travel and church camp. Without those immersive activities, if I’d just been in the normal humdrum, it would’ve been much harder to abstain from the ‘gram.

A renewed mind.

I don’t want to be overdramatic about this, but the break has honestly changed my thought patterns for the better. Instead of starting the day by mindlessly scrolling, I’m left alone with my own thoughts. I’m more proactive and have fewer imaginary debates in my mind.

Dose of humility.

I tend to have an inflated view of my influence. This manifests itself in myriad ways, which are not worth getting into; suffice it to say, I think the things I have to say are important and need to be heard. Social media often amplifies these impulses. One thing I’ve observed during my social sabbatical is no one has noticed my absence.

and so can you.

I’ll probably get back on social media in July, but I’m going to try to do it in a more measured way—less time and less mental energy. Less time curating my life, less time arguing, less time doom-scrolling, less time light-stalking to see whose marriage is on the rocks, etc. If you find yourself resonating with this, give it a go. Be a quitter, at least for a month.

I did it, and so can you.